I saw a bank that said "24 Hour Banking," but I don't have that much time.
Why don't they make the whole plane out of that black box stuff.
Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time.
So, do you live around here often?
My theory of evolution is that Darwin was adopted.
If it's a penny for your thoughts and you put in your two cents worth, then someone, somewhere is making a penny.
If God dropped acid, would he see people?
Cross country skiing is great if you live in a small country.
Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time.
How young can you die of old age?
I was reading the dictionary. I thought it was a poem about everything.
I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast at any time". So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.
I went to the bank and asked to borrow a cup of money. They said, "What for?" I said, "I'm going to buy some sugar."
I went to the museum where they had all the heads and arms from the statues that are in all the other museums.
I wrote a few children's books... not on purpose.
I'm writing an unauthorized autobiography.
If a word in the dictionary were misspelled, how would we know?
In Vegas, I got into a long argument with the man at the roulette wheel over what I considered to be an odd number.
Is it weird in here, or is it just me?
It doesn't make a difference what temperature a room is, it's always room temperature.
My neighbor has a circular driveway... he can't get out.
What's another word for Thesaurus?
When I die, I'm leaving my body to science fiction.
When I was a kid, I went to the store and asked the guy, Do you have any toy train schedules?
When I was crossing the border into Canada, they asked if I had any firearms with me. I said, "Well, what do you need?"
Whenever I think of the past, it brings back so many memories.
